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26 May 2017

Manchester Bomb Attack: The World is Calling for Oneness through Higher Consciousness

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It is of tremendous sorrow that we heard about the news on the bomb attack on May 22, Monday of this week, in Manchester, England. The world is hearing these types of news more frequently compared to the past where there only used to be battles on the field. Unfortunately, years after 2000 brought with them different types of wars which are very hard to respond to, let alone a possibility to stop them, they are tremendously unpredictable. We call them “terror attacks” usually carried out by an individual or a few people but having an enormous impact on how we live the rest of our lives, how we perceive the world around us, and the type of security we feel for ourselves and our loved ones. Beyond losing lives, we are living with a psychology of fear, threat and terror. In this type of environment it becomes a lot harder to concentrate on our life goals, our individual well being, in addition to our families, friends and communities.

While the whys and hows of these events around us circulate our minds, it is also important to take a moment to “reperceive” what is going on not as a “cause” but as a “result” of certain dysfunctionalities which has accumulated in this world not for years or decades, but for centuries, or even millenia. The human mind is set to focus on survival rather than evolution from the beginning. This focus on survival has led to living lives with a big concern to “protect oneself” rather than a concern for improvement. This means, we are used to living our lives in a way to “preserve” our beings rather than “look into our beingness and make changes for being more healthy and functional”. With the religious teachings, our ideas about this type of preservation were perpetuated. In addition, we have started to believe that God is the only force that could protect us from the unknown, the bad or the evil. This eventually led to a belief that there is nothing we can do as humans beyond a certain point. It is all in God’s hands especially in disasterous situations such as climate changes, earthquakes, terrible floods, and also wars. As those events came along one by one, especially in a very unpredictable manner, we strenghthened our tendencies to cling on to an invisible higher power.

This type of belief pattern has dominated human consciousness for centuries, and it is still not very different today, against all the improvements in technology, communication, logistics, machinery, and the life styles. Compared to the past, it is easier now to get to places, to hear about news, to communicate, to produce goods, and to make new improvements in our physical world. In fact, our rapid growth in each of these areas has become unstoppable given the way we are discovering something new everyday, every moment. However, against all these discoveries in our physical realm, we have not really gone very far in terms of discovering what is “inside” of us as human beings. Our inner power, emotions, thought patterns, in general, our whole being is still waiting there to be discovered. We were and we are still so preoccupied with what is around us that we are constantly ignoring that there are things to be discovered inside which eventually lead to what is going on outside.

Because this type of inner work is so much neglected by the humans for centuries, we could not make much progress in our human consciousness. You might naturally react and say: “Hey, these events around us are a result of certain ideologies and beliefs that have nothing to do with who I am or my loved ones.” and the solution might appear to you as increasing nations’ security systems, putting more protection walls around each country, and getting more armed against those evil forces which are there to get you any moment. I have to say, they are only temporary remedies. There will always be a threat to our survival if we live with that level of consciousness in our daily lives.

Let me give you an example to make my point more clear: Let’s start with very micro issues: How many of you are having inner conflicts and willing to look into them for a resolution? How many of you are having conflictual issues inside your families and close circle of social networks and working to solve them? On a wider scale, how many of you are responding to social issues going around you which obviously appear to you as injustice, inequality, mistreatment…etc.? On a larger scale, are you perceiving what is going around in any part of the world as if your own?

The world is full of stories where thousands of lives come to an end because of several reasons, ranging from personal to societal to political, almost everyday. Unless we take action as individuals, to start looking deeply into who we are, what we experience, what we accept and reject, how we divide and separate, and eventually what we do, our environments will reflect more of this type of ignorance.

To be able to start planting the seeds for oneness, we need to first start oneness within.

Kayla Wholey, PhD.

18 Oct 2016

My Book “Your First Step to Re-Create your Life in Oneness: Awareness” is out!

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Dear subscribers and followers, I’ve been very silent since my last post and the major reason for that is I’ve been working hard since the beginning of 2014 to write and publish my first book on Personal Oneness. Finally, it is out!

“Your First Step to Re-Creat your Life in Oneness: Awareness” aims to help all readers to be able use awareness as an important tool to re-create their lives from scratch. Here is the text from my presş release:

In “Your First Step to Re-Create Your Life in Oneness: Awareness” (published by Balboa Press), author Kayla Wholey, PhD., aims to help readers recreate their lives by achieving oneness with what the author describes as “the mind-body-soul levels” by demonstrating real-life examples in a practical format.

“Awareness is the first necessary step to achieve oneness inside. After oneness is achieved, it is lot easier to re-create your life from scratch (including all different life domains),” says Wholey. “By using awareness as your first tool, you can heal and transform yourself starting by removing blocks in your awareness and then applying simple awareness tips and suggestions.”

“Many books under the field of spiritual transformation usually talk about the problem and its possible solutions mostly in a cognitive way meaning the authors try to explain the remedies in a style which I call theoretical,” Wholey explains. “This book goes a little further beyond by offering a unique practical guide for the readers to reach fulfillment and happiness in their new lives by enabling individual oneness.”

“Your First Step to Re-Create Your Life in Oneness”
By Kayla Wholey, PhD.
Hardcover | 5.5 x 8.5 in | 248 pages | ISBN 9781504346405
Softcover | 5.5 x 8.5 in | 248 pages | ISBN 9781504346399
E-Book | 248 pages | ISBN 9781504346412
Available at Amazon and Barnes & Noble

Here is the book sellers information:





Hope you enjoy reading it!

In Oneness…


8 Dec 2013


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Mandela, a man representing equality, justice, democracy, anti-racism… finally, in my terms, Oneness… Has left the physical world 3 days ago to continue his soul’s journey to the future he will create next… Apart from being a political figure, he was profoundly a spiritual one. Let me explain why.

Mandela has fought peacefully for his cause: Anti-Racism, Anti-Poverty, and Justice for all. He was against discrimination of all beings. He not only was for his black brothers and sisters, but also for the white. After all those years he stayed in prison, everyone expected him to be full of rage and anger and that he would get back finally when he was in a position of power. But he didn’t.

Mandela & Oneness

Mandela and An Act of Oneness

He always was very friendly, modest, loyal, relaxed while in conversations, polite, courteous, attentive to everyone no matter what their status would be, and always looked for the best in others. He had a remarkable interest in humanity as a whole… and his actions demonstrated that at every step of the way.

What did motivate Mandela to be so patient over those years in prison? What led him to move on and wait till the time has come? Was it his self-actualizing potential, or his devotion to his ideas and plans or was it the fact that he already knew his time would come?

Well, I think the answer lies in neither of them. For me, Mandela spent and valued each moment for its own sake. Whatever the result would be, he moved on, and as he waited and kept patient all those years… I think he was in full acceptance. He accepted what came to him. But this wasn’t just a passive let go of everything, this was an acceptance of what the universe has to offer after one’s action of who he is. This was in fact oneness, oneness of being and act, oneness of mind, body and soul. Because they were too aligned, they kept Mandela healthy and powerful inside. As he did not separate who he is from his actions or words, he kept on, no matter what result would follow.
He was a man who created his reality each and every day, dreaming and realizing what he stood for.

In loving memory of Nelson Mandela…
With love and oneness…
Kayla Wholey, PhD.

2 Sep 2013

Travel Report: Lisbon

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Lisbon… The city of magnificent history and figures. I’ve visited Lisbon last Spring in March again for a global conference on Spirituality. This time I presented on “What Oneness Means”, a survey I have conducted with members of a spiritual organization. Interesting results came up… however I’d like to talk more about Lisbon and Oneness today.

Lisbon view

Lisbon is no like any other metropolitan. It has a style on its own, a culture and a life style that is so unique to itself. The streets of Lisbon reflect the “respect for the past” where you can see the old stones, buildings and houses kept as it was till today. It is very clean in Lisbon, also very calm, and relaxing. Although the culture has some mediterranean aspects to it, the living style, the understandings of work and societal issues I think are very Western European. The city is very very organized.

Coming to daily habits and behaviors of Lisbonians… They are used to foreigners and visitors so it is easy to get along with them as a foreigner. And I did not feel any prejudice about people from the Eastern side of the world so let’s look at specifically for Oneness behaviors:

  1. Warmth by people towards foreigners-Yes true, as explained above.
  2. Helping behavior-If you ask, definitely but the help you get would not go beyond what you simply ask. As an example, the receptionist in the hotel tried to give me the directions to the center of the city, but he could not explain it much so I had to figure that out myself.
  3. Not feeling as a foreigner inside the city-Definitely. But be careful about the taxis. They might charge you twice if they understand you are coming from another country.
  4. Communicate with you for your needs and concerns-Some know English but some locals may not know the language. And let alone language issues, the Portuguese are experiencing hard Economical problems lately so they may be so busy with what they have to do for work that they may not have the time to spend with you regarding any issues or problems you might be experiencing.
  5. All of us are treated as equals-Exactly,  no problem on that. We are all humans and you feel that in Lisbon.
That makes a total of 3,75 points out of 5 for Lisbon. This rating was based on my 5-day visit to the city so bear that in mind.
With love… in Oneness for Lisbon.


29 Aug 2013

Travel Report: New York

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New York… New York… So much has already been said and done about the city and my intention is not to write which has already been written so many times: Most famous city in the world, Over-crowded, Attractive, Beautiful, Cosmopolitan, Multi-cultural… All true about the city which I have visited more than 10 times in my lifetime. And each time I visited, I discover something very new about it, as there is so much to learn from the city itself, while the city is so busy to learn from you:)

The multi-culturalism helps with the Oneness spirit to grow in the city. Everybody came from a different place… in the past, this city was the immigration port where all different personalities landed to realize their dreams. Who came here? Who are those people who have crossed the Atlantic saying goodbye to their homelands and their families and friends at home… what kept them coming and coming… What did they desire and wanted to pursue?

I think those were, first and foremost, courageous people, people who loved freedom and chasing after their dreams more than anything. They were so centered in their individuality that the “bonds, the ties, all that which is so hard to cope emotionally” has been replaced with “goal orientation, achievement, personal development…and so on”. And New York, the hub of all those desires and wishes coming to fruit in time… May be that is why you feel so inspired, energetic and positive when in NY!

As we already know by now, Oneness requires self-love, acceptance of other cultures, positive communication..etc.; but it also requires consideration and acting according to that consideration. It is not only in the behaviors of people around you, but it also has to demonstrate itself in symbols, signs, the traffic, the language, and whatever that reflects the culture. For a basic example let’s take the NY subway. Everybody knows it, don’t they? Usually it is not hard to figure out the subway if you study it a bit. However, sometimes even the signs assume that you know what is for what is like “Columbus Circle is actually the Stop for Central Park or Uptown is the area of the Times Square, not the Downtown:) right?”  And NY, compared to its multicultural roots, is also strong in high individuality, therefore, separation. Oneness requires a delicate balance between individuality and collectivism so let’s look at how NY scores:

  1. Warmth by people towards foreigners-Absolutely true. You can see a stranger saying “Hi” to you in a friendly manner in NY and the fact that you are foreigner is something the inhabitants are very used to for centuries.
  2. Helping behavior-depending on the situation, on the venue and the person with whom you are trying to speak to.
  3. Not feeling as a foreigner inside the city-This is evident as everybody is and once was a foreigner.
  4. Communicate with you for your needs and concerns-Depends on who you run into.
  5. All of us are treated as equals-Exactly.

This makes 4 points out of 5 for NY…

Go for Oneness NY!



29 Aug 2013

Travel Report: Berlin

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Berlin… so much to say… Although the union of the East and West Berlin has transformed the city in all its culture and daily lifestyle, Berlin protects its roots, its history and legacy as Germany’s current capital and the largest city. The old and new is distributed evenly inside the city so you can have many tastes according to your daily preference. If you want to go to a museum, there is a region for that. If you want to go for shopping, it is in another area of town. Everything is organized and categorized in the city so it is easy to find your way. On top of all that almost everyone knows good amount of English language so you can ask someone if you feel really lost or trying to figure your way out.

Germans are known for their industriousness, tidiness and especially punctuality. If you are late for 1 minute to a show or a meeting, that is “late” in Germany so be prompt when you’d like to attend an event, watch a show or a movie in the city.

While going around, one thing that attracted my attention was that especially fathers were main ones taking care of the babies, not the mothers. You can see a man in every corner which is carrying the baby, feeding, and even cleaning the baby. This was striking as I come from a culture where you see the opposite. The baby belongs to the mother, our Turkish culture imposes.

Talking about cultures, there are many Turks living in Berlin, so if you are coming to visit from Turkey, you can find many taxis and waiters and bus drivers who are Turkish therefore who speak Turkish-the few areas in the world where you can have that luxury for Turkish speaking:) However, the most problematic side which has true implications for Oneness concept is the relationship between Turkish and German inhabitants. While talking to the Turkish drivers, I heard from most of them that “there is still racism evident” in the streets of Berlin and that even with the 2nd generation Turks who are born and raised in Berlin, this unfortunately goes on. Coming to the other side, from the German’s side, you can see that Turks are behaving towards them as very “separate” too. This actually accelerates the “separation between both sides” and thus you have the picture of Oneness broken between two cultures.

Let’s look at what we have for the Oneness Behaviors in Berlin:

  1. Warmth by people towards foreigners-you can feel this as this is a metropolitan city so many are used to foreigners walking and shopping around.
  2. Helping behavior-you can surely get help if you ask, if you do not ask, you may or may not depending on who you run into.
  3. Not feeling as a foreigner inside the country-So so.
  4. Communicate with you for your needs and concerns-Depends on who you run into. This may not be true for every German you meet.
  5. All of us are treated as equals-Sometimes.

This makes a total of 3 points for Berlin.

With more Oneness to come in your way Berlin.


29 Aug 2013

Travel Report: Cos Island

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Cos is a beautiful Greek Island where Hippocrates was born and raised, was trained at the first known medical center in the world:  Asklepieion.  First and foremost, Cos amazes me because despite its small size, it is one of the most historical sites in the world, attracting millions of tourists from all over. It is an island, where, the father of medicine has lived and taught his practice to his students by the Hippocrates Tree which I also had a chance to see and visit.

Cos Island is full of people with smiles and happiness. People so natural and genuine. People who love what they do and what they present. In spite of the fact that the Greeks have conflictual history with Turks, I have to say, I did not feel any resentment or an opposite reaction towards myself, in fact, I felt the opposite.

Greeks in Cos can help you out if you are lost, they would smile at you if you are looking for something. While knowing the truth about their worldwide heritage and fame, you do not feel any superiority being imposed on you while you are finding your way at the streets of Cos. Although Turks and Greeks are known for their battles, it is also very surprising to see how similar both cultures are in their daily practices, way of relating and communicating. Friendly, fast talks, jokes and laughs fill up the communication.

Coming to Oneness Behavior categories:

  1. Warmth by people towards foreigners-very evident.
  2. Helping behavior-you can surely get help if you ask, if you do not ask, you may or may not depending on who you run into.
  3. Not feeling as a foreigner inside the country-Completely
  4. Communicate with you for your needs and concerns-sure!
  5. All of us are treated as equals-exactly.

This makes almost 5 points for Cos. I think Hippocrates left a great heritage here. You can fee healing and the oneness energy all over.

For the land of Hippocrates… in Oneness.


29 Aug 2013

Travel Report: Moscow, Russia

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Moscow is another city full of strong past and history. The evidence of the past and the energy that comes with it is very evident all around the town. The Red Square, the Kremlin… St. Basil… all that reminds us of the noble heritage and strong ties with religion.

I was there for the 6th European Conference on Positive Psychology to present a paper on Oneness Behavior and Self-Awareness. And I have to say… Moscow is an amazing city, so big and so charming day and night… with a huge subway connecting many areas with one another. It is impossible not to be overwhelmed by the huge population and the metropolitan spirit of one of the largest cities in the world.

The people… and the culture… Let’s start with the language issues. The Russian Alphabet needs to be studied before you step into the city as everything that is being communicated is with this alphabet. This is kind of not easy and not a considerate approach for the other cultures and nationalities. Let alone the language, the marks and signs that make up one word make things more complicated and therefore, from a oneness standpoint, this is not “taking into consideration of the others”. The people… mostly turned inwards… to their own world, even in this big metropolitan city. Everyone seems to be living their life in their own terms and because this is a very expensive city, they are mostly trying to save the day and stay on top of the game.

Let’s go into the Oneness Behavior categories:

  1. Warmth by people towards foreigners-not very likely including the fact that being a foreigner might mean being open to “charged double or three times” the price for a cab, or for something you might buy as a souvenir.
  2. Helping behavior (even though you ask for it, you may not get it-you may even get the wrong information as not all people know English in Moscow)
  3. Not feeling as a foreigner inside the country-(you can not help but feel it each time as you do not understand anything)
  4. Communicate with you for your needs and concerns-you’d better try on your own.
  5. All of us are treated as equals-as this is a cosmopolitan city, you do not feel discrimination or as if you are a minority since it is too crowded and many people are living together here.
As for the points, not much more than 1,5 points in total for Moscow. Although Moscow has a communist past, it did not put people into a place of oneness or sharing, probably tied to the fact that there are so many problems people need to deal with individually (finding a job, decent income, good standards of living…etc.) yet.
All for Oneness in Moscow.


29 Aug 2013

Travel Report: Prague, Czech Republic

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Prague for me has been a city of visit several times for the holidays and conferences. The second time I’ve been there I attended the 2nd Global Conference on Spirituality, Theory, Praxis and Pedagogy for presenting a paper on “Teaching the Grade School Teachers a way to create a Transformational and Spiritual Training Program”. The two times I’ve been in Prague I had a chance to observe and to try to understand the behaviors of Czech people, how they live, talk, and relate…including how they react to certain things.
Prague is a “city of tales”, looking and feeling so old, full of history… too many historical buildings and statues…including the famous “Charles Bridge” where people demonstrate their talents… their works of art… the bridge is also full of historical monuments having all different meanings. One of them is the “abundance monument” where you can touch a certain area and wish for abundance in your life. The other is about a prisoner captured in an Ottoman prison with an Ottoman guardian waiting by the gate… a horrifying scene for the Europeans which in the past had many wars with the Ottoman Empire (former Turkey).
Including all those historical scenes, there is the center area and the famous “Astrological Clock Tower” that brings people together for celebration and clapping ceremony each hour.  The four figures in the clock are set in motion while they represent four things that were despised at the time of the clock’s making. From left to right in the photographs, the first is Vanity, represented by a figure admiring himself in a mirror. Next, the miser holding a bag of gold represents greed or usury. Across the clock stands Death, a skeleton that strikes the time upon the hour. Finally, the Turk tells pleasure and entertainment (!) (from Wikipedia ). Here you can feel Oneness energy so much because there are so many people coming together for this show from all different parts of the world, all different races and nationalities. This goes on day and night in Prague and the city becomes so impressive after the sun goes down. It is amazing how great the lighting is… you feel like you are in a different time, different world. Especially lighting is very important for Prague since the sun goes down after 4 PM during fall and winter times.
Now let’s look at Prague in terms of Oneness Behaviors:
  1. Warmth by people towards foreigners-depends on who you run into. There are those who are wonderful to approach, and those who are not very friendly towards foreigners (0,5 points)
  2. Helping behavior (usually received help if asked someone in a proper way and making sure they know English)
  3. Not feeling as a foreigner inside the country-(impossible as many things are in Czech language and if you are not in a historical area, you might have a hard time understanding the words)
  4. Communicate with you for your needs and concerns-yes but may or may not listen fully so 0,5 points
  5. All of us are treated as equals-almost there.

Prague receives 2,75 for the Oneness behavior points. Again, these are restricted to observations in about 4-5 days and can not be generalized to the whole nationality and the culture.

In terms of uniting the past, present and the future, Prague leans mostly on the past… while trying to reach out to the present day with its efforts in certain areas of living.

With love… in Oneness for Prague.


23 Sep 2012

Travel Report: Varanasi, India

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I have been in Varanasi at the end of February this year. I was wishing to visit India for so many years and now it was the chance. I had a Conference to attend and present a research paper on Oneness and here I was, in a perfectly spiritual city full of history and monuments of Buddhism.

I have visited Buddha’s Sarnath and have felt the incredible spirituality and enlightenment associated with the area. I also took a boat trip on the Ganges (called Ganga by Indians), saw the redemption of the dead ceremonies and celebration of Ganga ceremonies by the river.

When you talk about India, immediately you think about Spirituality, Life after Death, Millions of people living together in a big beautiful country. When you see India, you experience other things as well; like poverty, almost no housing, dirt, noisy horns by cars, no decent travel roads,…etc. Although you might wonder why such a thing would be evident in such a spiritual and historically rich, resourceful country, when you look at it deeply from the point of oneness, you can see some evidence.

Oneness requires taking care of oneself first and then helping/supporting/respecting/honoring others. In India, you see a lot of concern regarding “caring for the other”. The people are very friendly, they want to help and they consider you. They are very respectful in their daily gestures and conversations. However, when it comes to really seeing others’ needs and concerns, there are certain occasions when they might also fail like any other human being in our world. Sometimes there are delays and disappointing changes in schedules, when you make a plan on your visit budget, you might find out that the information given to you might have been absolutely wrong, and you might end up paying more than you have planned. When you ask why, they might end up saying: Sorry… we made a mistake, that’s it. They might offer you things you are not ready to handle or do… and they might insist on those things-which  might become annoying after sometime:)

There you see that without taking care of oneself first, actually it is not 100% possible to take care of the other fully, in a better and a comfortable way. The living conditions, the poverty, accepting things the way they are… These are the realities of the human conditions in India and how they see and live the world as is. May be staying spiritual and religious leads them to not to take care of what is in front of them-meaning the worldly reality. May be too much living out of this world leads to that, I don’t know.

Anyway, full of spirituality and history, I respect and honor all Indians with all my heart. And I wanted to jot down a few words on Oneness about them. Here are my Oneness ratings:

  1. Warmth by people towards foreigners-fully evident-actually I had so much fun and wonderful connection with my new Indian friends-they were great!
  2. Helping behavior (may or may not help you at the end of the day but is there so 0,5 points)
  3. Not feeling as a foreigner inside the country-fully evident
  4. Communicate with you for your needs and concerns-yes but may or may not listen fully so 0,5 points
  5. All of us are treated as equals-fully evident

This makes 4 points out of 5 for India. I would say they would do great if they could start thinking of their personal selves too.

All healing and beautiful energies for India… in Oneness.